Edit drafts

As shown below I had created a first draft for my edit. In this first draft there is no colour grading present or the use of b- roll. I simply cut down any unnecessary information, ensuring that I allow enough time to implement the use of b roll footage and certainly the use of vhs footage which was my main focus and feature I wanted to add to the documentary. Furthermore I added subtitles to allow feedback to be given easily aswell as guiding me through editing.

I made to sure to continue the theme of nostalgia and reminiscing for the past, though in my feedback I found that the narrative I had created in the first draft intensified the theme of family. For instance, at the time stamp of 00:20, the subject explains how it was difficult to say goodbye to his parents and later on he explains how his own family encourages him and gives him hope. In order to support this theme, I made the decision in the second draft (below) to omit the part where the subject speaks about the war and how it was different as the documentary focuses much more on an individuals story and their nostalgia for their own past rather than immigrants in general and how they all ultimately deal with the hardships of fleeing a war.

Other changes I made which are present in the second draft are that I omitted the part where the subject speaks about the song/sound that is nostalgic to him. Though this part would be interesting keep in the documentary if the duration of the documentary is longer and it would only work if the song would be used in the documentary. Though it did not fit in with the tone and mood of the documentary. Furthermore I have also added the vhs footage I felt that were appropriate corresponding the answers of the subject aswell as using the footage as an introduction to the documentary.

In order to improve my second draft I will begin by making the documentary slightly shorter as it is at 3:05 at the moment without credits. I also received feedback in which at the time stamp of 1:22 there is some repetition: “when I came to the UK, the moment I felt like I was at home in the UK”. The section at 2:42 needs to be condensed or taken out as the subject has already established his successes in the uk. Furthermore I will begin to refine the colour grading of the documentary as the lighting varies especially towards the end of documentary.